"Chicks like shoes," said Andrew Cheng, peering over his
blue-tinted shades.
Cheng, 37, was among a group of about 75 men and women who
showed up one recent weekday evening at Macy's off Union
Square for a men's "Dating Wardrobe 101."
The event, part speed dating, part fashion show and filled
with tips on how to dress for dating, was co-hosted by Macy's
West, Men's Health magazine, Cole Haan shoes and
8minuteDating.com, a dating service that matches single men
and women on the Web and in person.
Cheng, who works for a credit card company, said he tries
to make his clothes pop on a first date. He likes funky shoes,
such as the ones he was wearing at the Macy's event -- patent
leather kicks with high soles.
"What guys think is cool clotheswise usually sucks," he
said. "You got to look sort of gay, 'Queer Eye for the
Straight Guy' and all that. The gay guys on that show have
some really good advice."
Wine, vodka and bubbly water flowed at the event and hors
d'oeuvres were passed out on napkins, as the men and women,
ages 21 to 65, mingled and surveyed the male models' outfits.
"It's really geared to the young professional looking to
upgrade his look," said 8minuteDating.com founder Tom Jaffee,
who attended the event with his wife, Cathy. Together, the
couple, who met at a cocktail party in late 2000 and were
married in January, filled out name tags at the registration
table. "It's also a fun way to network."
Four models, all in their 20s and early 30s, strutted down
a short platform as a disc jockey spun a mixture of ambient
and dance music. Men's Health fashion director Brian Boye,
wearing a floral shirt under a brown pinstripe jacket and tan
trousers, narrated. The outfits ranged from stylish jeans,
comfortable untucked shirts, cords and chunky sweaters to a
semiformal black suit.
As the models moved across the stage, Boye reminded the
guys in the audience about some other basic dating advice. "Be
a gentleman. Chivalrous is not over," he said. "Open doors for
her. If you invite her, pay the bill. Stand up if she stands
up. If a shirt has tails, tuck it in. If it doesn't, don't
tuck it in. With a suit jacket, never button the bottom
button."
With the popularity of TV makeover shows like "Queer Eye
for the Straight Guy," more straight men are showing an
interest in putting an effort into how they look, Boye said.
"Gay men have always been more daring in their style of
dressing," Boye said. "But the rules are changing for straight
men, too. Men are becoming more educated about their style and
the many avenues they have to express themselves. Levi's are
cool as long as you put thought into your whole outfit.
"Dating is so stressful, but it's a necessary evil. You
want to make the best first impression you can."
Jaffee, who began his business in January 2001, buzzed
around the event, encouraging men and women to talk to each
other.
"Typically people have difficulty networking at parties,"
he said. "They'll often glom onto one person and talk to that
same person all night, missing the opportunity to meet a
variety of people. This (type of dating event) takes away some
of the awkwardness. It maximizes your chance of talking with
people you'd actually want to meet again." His advice to shy
people and people who have been out of the dating scene for a
while: Go in with an open mind and expect to have fun.
"Even if you meet one person in two hours, and you don't
necessarily fall in love, it was a great use of your time."
Jerry G., a 37-year-old financial planner from Mill Valley
who didn't want to give his last name, said he found the event
useful.
"I agree, it's important how you dress on a date," he said.
"It's important to make a good first impression. You want to
be neat and dress appropriately for the place you're going. I
always check with my date about what she's wearing so I don't
show up under- or overdressed."
Beyond that, he said, his advice is to relax and be
yourself.
Two women attending the event, Angie Perez and Michelle
Horn, stood back checking out the models' outfits. They said
the success of a date comes down to subtle elements like
chemistry and the quality of conversation.
"I expect a guy to wear clean and pressed clothes," said
Perez, a 31-year- old student from San Francisco. "Beyond
that, as long as their outfit is not too wild, it doesn't
matter that much. Women do like guys in sweaters. They show
off their bodies -- crew neck, long sleeves are good."
"In San Francisco, styles really vary, and that's what
makes it fun," chimed in Horn, a 32-year-old pharmaceutical
company employee. "There are really no strict color
guidelines."
"What you want to avoid," Perez said, "is doing like one
guy I went out on a date with who showed up in a polka-dot
shirt and a Davy Crockett hat. That was a disaster.'
